Dirty Hot Dog Puns
Once you're finished reading them, give them an evaluation on a decimal scale and share these silly jokes with your friends and your foes. #1. We just got a fax. At work. We didn't know we had a fax machine. The entire department just stared at it. I poked it with a stick. 370 points. POST.
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14. What's a cat's favorite dessert? A bowl full of mice-cream. 15. Where did the music teacher leave her keys? In the piano! 16. What did the policeman say to his hungry stomach? "Freeze.
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124. r/Jokes. Join. • 6 days ago. Dad had the opportunity to buy his medications directly from the pharmacy company. "Here is your prescription sir, that will be $515 dollars." Dad was a bit hard of hearing so he only heard the $15. He dropped that amount on the counter and left. The clerk yelled "Wait sir, $515 dollars!"
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For when you need a fast funny joke, here are some short jokes to get anyone giggling.. What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything. 33 / 102.
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It is hotter than a lady wolf under a full moon. It's hotter than a fat kid at a Weenie Roast. It's hotter than a dog looking at a fire hydrant. It's hotter than your momma's oven in here. It's hotter than the door knocker on the gates of hell. It's hotter than asphalt on a California driveway.
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Hot as Hades. Hotter than H-E double hockey sticks. Hot as H-E double toothpicks. Hot as the hinges on the gates of Hades. Hotter than six shades of hell. Hotter than Satan's house cat. Even Satan's sweatin' today.
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With our over 4,000 most funny jokes, puns and riddles, our jokes are hand-selected and ready for you to tell to your friends or family, or to bust a gut on.
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The theme may be cold and as thick as heavy snow, but these jokes will fill the room with warm and cozy laughter! 1. It's so cold even prisoners are begging for the electric chair. What the cold weather does to cold people! 2. It's so cold my shadow froze on the sidewalk. I can only imagine how people in the park would react! 3.
56 Sizzling It's So Hot Jokes! LaffGaff, Home Of Laughter
It's so hot outside I just saw two hobbits throw a ring off my roof. It's so hot I saw a heatwave and I waved back. It's so hot polar bears are wearing sunscreen. It's so hot all the sand on the beach is now glass. It's so hot outside I saw a chicken poop scrambled eggs.
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5. It's so hot that my popcorn seeds starting popping. 6. It's so hot that I called my ex to get some shade. 7. It's so hot that Satan went back to hell to cool down. 8. It's so hot that Jehovah's Witnesses started telemarketing. 9. It's so hot that birds started pulling out worms with an oven mitt. Related: 45+ hilarious weather.
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Corpus Crispy. A tourist was passing through a town in the heat of summer. He wanted to be sure the water was good to drink, so he asked a local. "Oh, yes," they assured him. The tourist then asked the local what made them so sure. "Well," they answered, "first we filters it, then we takes out the harmful minerals, then we puts it.
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It's so hot that the clams were already steamed when I dug them up. It's so hot that I have taken to leaving the toilet seat up just to get those chilling, icy stares from my wife. It was so hot that the soles of my shoes melted. It's so hot that you can poach eggs in a pool. It's so hot even my wife's heart is melting.
Funny Summer Jokes for Kids That Will Help Them Beat the Heat!
Heat Jokes. Q: What does a bee do when it is hot? A: He takes off his yellow jacket! Q: How do you make holy water? A: Boil the hell out of it! Q: How hot is it in Southern California? A: So hot every fat guy sweating in the city smells like Bacon! Q: How hot is a Los Angeles summer? A: So hot that I saw a fire hydrant chasing a pack of dogs!
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Whether you're dealing with one hot day or a heat wave, these jokes will help you get through it. It's so hot that… jokes - or How Hot is It? jokes - are always popular during the summer months. Speaking of summer, make sure you also check out these related joke collections: Beach Jokes, Summer Jokes, 4th of July Jokes and Swimming Jokes.
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MOBILE USERS CLICK HERE FOR JOKE SLIDESHOW. The recent heat wave across the Inland Northwest has given us the opportunity to dust off some really bad jokes to illustrate exactly how hot it is.
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It's so hot out, Superman took a cab. It's so hot, I saw a dog chasing a cat and they were both walking. It's so hot out, I saw a chicken lay a fried egg. It's so hot out, I just saw a penguin blow a seal. It's so hot in Texas, I bought some Mrs Baird's bread, but by the time I got home, it was Texas Toast.